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Salvation Reduced To 500 Billion Years

Saying they were reluctant to make the change but that budget pressures left them no other choice, divine sources announced Tuesday that the traditional promise of salvation would be reduced from eternity to 500 billion years. http://www.theonion.com/articles/budget-woes-force-heaven-to-reduce-eternal-life-to,36012/?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&utm_campaign=Default:2:Default #Funny

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